Where do you fit yourself in the world and why?
“I DON'T KNOW
Ahhhhhhhh
Still feel too young to know that. Will I ever know that?”
“im hairdressing now but I actually wanted to do acting but family didn't think it would be successful”
“I'm just another person chasing their dreams and hoping they're special enough to actually succeed.”
“I do not fit and i do not know why and it makes me feel very lonely”
“I work cleaning dishes four days a week and I get drunk in the weekend, pretty much fit nowhere.”
“I don't feel like I do, I'm not sure why, I just don't feel like I fit anywhere in the world”
“I'm a broke uni student, cos i feel broke and still have the (im)maturity of a 16 year old. But I dont feel like its a bad situation. Most people my age are in my financial situation and we all complain together!”
“I don't know where I fit in the world yet. All things going well i'd like so see myself as a successful creative person making positive changes in the world. But I might end up as unemployed and on a benefit so who really knows ! I feel that i'm too young to know where i'm going or what I even really want - still sorting shit out !”
“i would say that although I have a home, i am kind of a nomad - student wise. I cant remember the last time i spent more than 3 months in a city before going somewhere else for a month or more. I have a lot of people I call friends but I do often find myself without many physical friends around me because I am always moving.”
“I'm just a little tiny speckle on a planet of billions. Because it's true.”
“A lowly undergrad who wants to change the world.”
“In the silly adolescent group, because that's where I am and how others perceive me I guess”
“Currently not really anywhere. Feel like that because am still trying to find my identity, and unsure about practically everything.”
“I do think I ever fit in. ..... I gave up a good job ,a nice flat and a stable boyfriend because that wasn't enough.”
“... Slightly on the outside, observer. I felt alienated a lot growing up so I still put myself there. I don't mind that. I'm not a hugely influential person to a wide amount Of people but within my close associates I'm valued for being myself. I feel content with where I am in the world and in relation to others”
“I don't fit anywhere actually, there is nowhere in the world that needs me or what I can do. there are no spaces to be filled.”
“I'm a musician and I fit around the mentally ill and other musicians. Often, that's a very similar crowd”
“Everybody is in their own little world. My place is forever changing in recent years. Still on the move. From town to town. Hopefully from country o country soon.”
“Im not sure. I guess im still trying to figure out were i fit. Like most 20 year olds.”
“I fit in a me shape hole in this world and there is no significant purpose from my existence other then make what I can of it, love and live well.”
“Currently i see myself as a potential. At the moment not contributing to too much. But I'm investing this time so i can be more later.”
“Struggling through first year of uni through friendships, a change of scene, and new education.”
“I'm still figuring out where I fit in this world, I would like to help making the world a better place, but that's hard, even in daily life there are so many contradictory choices I make.”
“I don't know I want to be someone of influence one day just because”
“With the majority who are just trying to find their way and doing that at a day at a time”
“I'm not sure. I think I'm figuring that out.”
“I don't think about this. I don't think there is such a thing as 'fitting' into anything, let alone the world which is big enough for us to be whoever and where ever we want.”
“I am an unemployed mum on a benefit; I matter to no one except my boyfriend”
“Dunno, just a poor student”
“still finding that out, if I knew that i think it might be kinda boring? if you have a solid place in this mess then theres no mystery- sounds kinda stale"
“I feel very privileged but also have some white guilt. I am a feminist. I am very left wing in my beliefs but capitalist in my desires. I am just a bunch of contradictions. I think this is because I had a very grounded upbringing but I also grew up being very jealous of people who appeared to have more money, nicer clothes etc than me, due to their parents priorities.
I feel I am in a position to help others and that it is a reponsibility.”
“My general life philosophy is that the only purpose of the individual is to be as happy and kind to others as possible. I guess I just see myself as another person who says 'thanks' to the bus driver and is nice to everyone, because that makes me happy and it helps other people having a shitty day feel a bit better, and then go on to be nice to others.”
“I'm in a privileged position - educated, stable home, physically fit etc. I feel that anyone in a position of privilege faces multiple opportunities to use this platform to raise social awareness - not enough do. I think it's a duty, so I do my best. There are people in this world whose voices are made so insignificant, we have to speak up for them.”
“I see myself as one of the people who will sacrifice a lot of their life to help others”
“Errmmmm, I'm not really sure. Depends in what way you're talking about. I think I was a bit of a nomad up until I hit uni, maybe even a failure. I'm doing ok now though.”
“I fit myself at the bottom of the heap. Basically someone who is falling through the cracks despite how much I try to make sure that isn't happening. The reason why is because I can't seem to get out of this financial black hole. No work = no money = bane of society = useless no hope, statistic = depression and self-loathing. It doesn't take much to figure out.”
“Kind of in the middle. Not up there, but not low either... Im kinda just the fly on the wall at the moment and when the right time comes to hop off, hopefully I can.”
“roughly where I should be. Still at uni and learning the skills I need but also with the influence to change or alter possibilities”
“ An average full time worker, paying bills and saving money for travel and a house. But also an average 18 year old partying on weekends and not being sure about what to do with my life.”
“I help the world go round with the little things I do. I help out in the community, I voice my opinion and try to act the way I preach to leave the world a better place.”
“At the moment I don't really feel that I have a space.”
“I don't fit too well because I'm always positive and believe I can do anything and i think that's quite hard for lots of people”
“Somebody who's trying pretty hard to feel like they deserve a place here on this wee planet of ours.”
Where do you feel you are in life at the moment? Do you think that you are at the stage you should be in life whatever this is?
“if you imagine life as a motorway i'm the car broken down on the side of the road. this is not where i should be”
“According to the yard stick, I think I'm on track. But am I happy and truly fulfilled? No. Not at all. Do I still feel lost like I did when I was 15? Yes, but now I have the pressure of hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of debt keeping me getting up and going to work instead of having a giant blowout and a tantrum and staying in bed like I would have when I was 15.”
“I'm very positive about the future! I'm about to graduate, and next year I'll very likely have a full-time job in the industry I've wanted to work in since I was 15. I think I've made very good decisions (ie, not getting a BA) and it's paying off now. It's taken me a while to get to a place where I'm happy with my life and confident being myself, and I'm really excited about the next stage of my life (post-Uni).”
“I don't feel prepared for adult life.”
“I feel I am behind everyone else. I should have a job / flat / significant other but I don’t"
“Yeah i feel like im in the right place. Occasionally i see people who are excelling at 20 years old and i feel inadequate but then i see people who are doing shit all and I realise that my life is pretty good at the moment.”
“I think so. But the transition from student to qualified is extremely scary and I sometimes get a tiny but anxious over it. Been a student for 16 years and now I'm about to get thrown into the big bad real world :S but you can't really measure it. Some of my friends are still deciding what they want to do and that's ok too, I think it's uncommon to know exactly what you want to do. I do think far to many people go to uni because that's whats expected of them tbh.”
“I feel like my stage in life is self discovery. I feel like although i do not 'have my shit together' in a material sense, I have taken time to find myself, taking myself away from everything familar in order to find the real me and work out what i really want.I think that although this is not where i expected to be in life now that it is actually the right place.”
“Although I would say that I'm a goal orientated person. I haven't really plotted my life, so I can't really gauge where I should be, in terms of what I have, working towards etc. To say that there is a stage I should be in, seems to remove the potential from what I can or will do.”
“Poor and unemployed. I am definitely not at the stage I should be at.”
“feel a little lost but that's ok”
“I feel that I'm right where I should be. I may be ahead of most my age, but I'm comfortable.”
“Im still finishing off my degree so I feel like for me I'm in the right place in my life at the moment. Some of my friends have full time jobs and stuff but that wasn't the right thing for me.”
“The blindly stumble my way through the year stage. And yes I think this sounds about right for now”
“I feel like I am in the stage of uncertainty and fear. No, I do not think I should be here right now, nor do I want to be.”
“I'm on my way to boredom at work but I'm making money to enjoy life. But im not making 100k a year which is where I aim to be in the next 5 years.”
“I think uni is seen as a stage so I'm there but I also skipped the messing about stage the free and easy stage due to responability”
“I think im probably not in the right stage of life for my age. Most people I meet on my travels are a lot younger , which is an indication that backpacking at 28 isn't the norm.”
“Still on my journey and learning more about myself and how to deal with things as they pop up.
I think i am at the stage i should be, i don't have many expectations of "it should be this way" But i would like to be at a further point in my relationship than we are, hence the learning ^, I'm a rusher and he's a slowpoke lol”
“Im in "the rutt". Pay check to pay check. But learning what I can from it to make myself better in future"
“A shit place, pissing my money away on a uni degree that is probably not going to get me employed.”
“I would like to be less horribly in debt thank you very much, but other than being poor as a church muse I feel quite successful for my age.”
“Not at all. feel like I should be gaining experience in work and in life.”
“Yes, but only because studying is a necessary step in getting a job.”
“I think I am living life to a sub par standard and that I should be somewhere more secure in life, most likely because I am comparing myself to my seemingly more together friends.”
“While some around me are buying houses, having babies with long term partners/ being single mums, I feel I'm still finding my place in the world. I know what I want to do but it's just getting there on schedule.”
“Work wise. I feel like im in a good stage. I feel like im doing better than most 20 year olds who might have been thru the same circumstances as myself. Mentally. im still yet to get to a better place.”
“I feel like I'm still very young in the world, that I'm still waiting for something to start but I have a hard time deciding what that is it's more of a feeling. But I am enjoying my life in the everyday. Although I thought that I would be further down the track (as I described above) I have discovered that 22 is still very young”
“I feel I'm exploring the world and trying to find something to do for living whilst traveling. And I think my age perfectly fits the stage I'm in right now, although it's also an age in which you start worrying more about whats next.”
“I don't really think I'm where i should be but I also don't know where I should be”
“I feel as though i'm a little behind. The majority of 23 year olds I know have already finished their undergrad degree and are working in decent jobs OR already have children with their partner. I'm not finishing my degree till the end of next year and am nowhere near having children.”
“I don't think there is a "should be" stage at any time in your life. I'm 25 and quit a good job in Washington, DC to move to New Zealand on a whim. I grew excruciatingly numb while working in a desk job that wasn't stimulating and when you talk to everyone around you (friends, family, strangers) you realize that that's what everyone's doing and they're all waiting for the next break, which is usually just a week or vacation. I'm not doing what my friends are doing and most people would never move spontaneously just to travel and have a new experience. People get sucked into stability and career and what they "should" be doing. Fuck that. I don't know where in life I am but does anyone want to?”
“I think people move at their own pace and figure things out in their own way so I never like being told that there are 'stages' in life that people have to 'be in' or 'achieve'. Fuck that. At the moment in life I am happy and that's the 'stage' I hope to be in until I die.
If we are talking literally/physically, right now in life I am living with people I love, doing uni work that I love, and earning money as a nanny which I love.”
“Nope I should be "doing something “”
“a transitionary/ learning stage. I think this is this "stage" i want to be in always, constantly learning and developing”
“No, nowhere near it”
“I feel like I am to young to be in a 9-5 job that isn't that amazing. I should be travelling or pursuing passions”
“I'm at the stage of discovery who I am and working out the direction and morals I want to have”
“Stuck, No i can do more if their were more hours in a day”
“I think I am at a fine stage. Everyone moves through life at their own pace and in their own direction.
I want children and am very aware of the increased risks to your child health based on maternal age so I have always had a fairly specific time frame of where I want to be and when. I always assumed it would not work out like that but it has. However those plans are specific to me. They do not include things like travel which many people feel is important.”
“I feeeeeeeel.. like I am in the beginning? I don't know I almost feel like I am in a transition-y stage, where I have more responsibility over myself than I've ever had but I still feel the youngest I've ever been”
“I am where I am and where I am is happy. I feel this is exactly where I should be. To put a tangible answer to this though currently I am on placement and yes this is where I should be.”
“I can't be anywhere other than where I am right now. I may wish to have travelled already, or have enough money to do what I need to do without working 9-5, but that is a reality that is not mine right now. I work patiently (sometimes impatiently) towards higher consciousness.”
“A student, but I think we never stop learning so this is a continuous/overarching stage, and i'm just rolling with it.
I think everyone has different expectations on where they ought to be and that challenges how they recognize where they are now and the direction they are headed. I think stressing about it isn't going to to get you anywhere faster. I'm trusting that pacing the journey and keeping my mind open will lead me to where I need to be.”
“im a bit stuck as im on a apprenticeship and get really crap pay and I don't know if the job is worth the pay and the stress for assignments.”
“I feel I have only just begun to figure out who I am and what I think I want to do.”
“At the moment in life, I am at the bottom of the heap however even though this is slightly negative I do have hopes of achieving more than what is statistically applicable to me being a minority and coming from what could be seen as a broken home. I am not at a stage in life where I am ready to accept that it is what it is, as I know with sheer determination and hard work I can make things better for myself.”
“I think i'm in an extremely lucky position!. I'm very priveledged to be attending university. I have also exceeded my own expectations of myself.”
“I thought I would finish university at 20 or 21, get married around 23 - 26, and start having kids around 25 - 29. I'm likely to finish uni at 22, and I still haven't been in a serious committed relationship yet. Despite life being different to what I expected in other ways, I'm pretty happy with where things are. I can't complain.”
“I'm really happy that I am doing what I am. During highschool I never pictured myself being at university, I didn't think that I was capable. Yet here I am.”
“I feel like I went through the motions that I felt were expected of me, whilst also putting my partners before myself to the extent that I never pursued my own dreams. I'm changing that now.”
“I'm at a stand stall. I have been accepted to go back to uni next year but is it the right move? I have been working full time and travelling for 2 months every year and now going back to no money and no freedom to travel seems like a step back. Most of my friends graduated latest year so sometimes I guess I don't think I am at the right stage. I do have more life experience then they do. I am looking forward to them understanding a full time job!”
“The awkward stage between being a man and being a teenager.”
“I am where I am. Perhaps I thought I'd be more independent by now or less silly or have be in a committed relationship but at the end of the day I think I 'should be' at a 'stage' where I'm finding out who I'm going to be - which I'm doing.”
“I feel like I'm at the lowest part of my life. I feel like everyone has left, figured out their life and moved on while I'm still stuck in the same ground. I feel like everything is piling up and I don't know how much more I can handle.”
“I'm starting to figure out what I want to do with my life and If so I've figured it out faster than I thought I would”
“I feel like I'm a confused, ignorant and somewhat afraid 22 year old. I often find myself hoping that things will become easier to cope with mentally in the next few years, because at the moment, shit's quite turbulent. However I know there are some changes that I could make to improve my mentality and health, even though the manifestation of these changes would require a herculean effort.
All in all, I feel that there are probably other 22 year olds out there having a similar or worse time than me”
“Yeah I guess, there isn't really a 'should be', there's society's expectations but that doesn't matter to me. Just where I am at the moment is where I'm meant to be, wherever that is.”
Do you feel pressured to be a well rounded grown-up? What pressures do you feel
“It's hard to get as much done as you want and still try new things and maintain commitment and a job/keeping up with money. Finding a balance is stressful.”
“Trying to make enough money in the week to pay for uni whilst simultaneously completing uni.”
“Must be financially sensible and stable, a proper boyfriend instead of one-night stands, shouldn't smoke, shouldn't drink.
I do the opposite of all of these things.”
“Yes, feel the pressure to hurry up and get my degree, to not mess around, to have a job and not ever be without something to do.”
“Pressures to conform with the norm. Looking around and seeing all your friends married with kids , makes you feel like you should be doing the same.”
“The pressure to not give up because you will seem "weak" or a “wimp" “
“I don't feel very pressured to be anything. I felt more pressure at school, maybe that's why I did poorly in school.”
“i feel pressures to be presentable, to be smart and to be "better" than other people in terms of finding work and writing a CV to apply for jobs.. which makes me uncomfortable.”
“All of the pressures. Get married. Buy a house. Have kids. Earn good coin. Have a good job but preferably a career. Have a sound reputation. Spend money on buying status items but don't get into debt ever and don't spend irresponsibly. Drink but don't drink too much. Don't do drugs. Be straight up and down, live a grey life. “
“No pressure until seeing some mates already owning their own homes and I'm still working to survive.”
“Yes I feel like I've been on this perfect little path for my whole life to please my family”
“The pressure comes from everywhere, but mostly my parents and the insurmountable amount of debt that I have from going to university.”
“Fit into the norm and work the 9-5 job like everyone else. Have financial responsibilities and look to settle”
“I don't have studylink so I feel a lot of pressure from my parents to do well. I think my parents want to be proud of me and tell their friends about me as I was the first one in my immediate family to attend a university. My friends are more ambitious than me as well so I feel they put the same expectations of themselves onto me.”
“The pressure that is felt in all of life is basically to get a job/career so you can start achieving goals i.e have a family or travel. I feel the pressure from family and friends as well as society to get a job but its alot harder than it looks.”
When you were in high school what were your perceptions of where you would be now?
“I believed I would be married with children by now , but instead I am backpacking across the world.”
“I would be at uni, but it would not be this fucking stressful”
“I thought I would feel less aimless, if anything i am more naive and without direction than I ever was in highschool.”
“I thought I would have graduated university and have a job in a my field by now”
“Through all of high school, with the exception of yr13 I though i would be a builder in Auckland with the rest of my family. In Year 13 I thought i would still be in pre-med.”
“I thought I'd be at drama school and not so broke.. Lol.”
“I thought I'd be at drama school and not so broke.. Lol.”
“I thought I would be more career-focused (because I was back then). My goal was to be a doctor or something medical related and be very successful in my career. I think I was living an "on a distinct path" kind of life back then.”
“I thought I would go through university and get a good job and have a successful career. I knew it wouldn't be that easy to get all the things I want e.g. high position in a company, a house etc”
“I knew I'd be at university but I didn't really know what I would be studying.”
“I thought I would be a successful author, or at uni; but instead I got pregnant and now have a 14 month old and a long term relationship :/“
“I thought I would have been getting paid to play sports professionally”
“At uni and way more social and super responsible with a car and stuff I guess”
“I thought I'd be broke, miserable, living in a shit flat and working a shit job.”
“i didnt think i would be at uni, i wanted to live by a beach and have a goat and grow crops and not work, just paint pictures all day.”
“experiencing life activities and thought flatting would be easier than it is lol”
“I thought I would at least have finished a teachers degree and working in a secondary school teaching history. Unfortunately it didn't work out and now I am unemployed trying to find any type of work I can get before xmas when summer holidays start and all the jobs are filled up.”
“I thought I would have done more that what I have achieved - job, relationship and travel”
“Achieving better grades than I am, having more money”
“I was very unsure about what I would be doing in the future, I had no plans. I was scared of growing up so I thought I would be stuck living with my parents forever.”
“19 sounded old, I thought I'd be a lot better put together than I actually am now.
“Not living at home, a career-relevant job, a fair idea of what I wanted from life”
Where do your life expectations come from?
“Our parents' generation ("back when I was a kid...") and the generation before us who have essentially shown us 'what to do'. Media also plays a MASSIVE role in this; showing us how we 'should' be running our lives”
“Expectations of myself? I think a lot of it comes from seeing how my peers and people slightly older than me are doing. Especially young creatives. Its so competitive and its also really easy to see through social media what those people are up to and what they are achieving. I guess there are the expectations of my family - i like to make them happy, but over all i do what i think is right by me. Oh and of course just society putting general pressure on me to fit in and do well etc..”
“My sister had a degree, and all my friends were going to university because our high school pushed it.”
“I think my family expects and expected very little of me in terms of continuing education or saving the world type stuff.”
“Both my parents had kids very young , so there was an expectation , especially with my father that I would of made him a grandad by now.”
“Parents. And things that you feel you ought to do yourself that parents don't necessarily agree with. For me that's learning maori. I'd like to think that more people just do what they feel they should do themselves but many descions we make are hinged on our parents or grandparents expectations of us.”
“How To Be A Good Person 101 at Kapiti College, AKA How Not To Fail At Everything And Die.
They were wrong, I think,”
“Myself and in comparison to others”
“They're social constructs with my own insecurities overlaid on them I expect. And / or a desperation to do things differently to my mother.”
“My expectations are inspired by my surroundings; where I don't want my life to lead. Wait, correction. Where I don't want to lead my life! People around me are at stages of life that aren't for me just yet! Babies and relationship problems aren't my prerogative.”
“An over estimation of just how responsible you are in your twenties. This probably also comes from media and celebrities that are famous at my age but look a lot older than they are and are getting paid mega bucks.”
“Mainly myself. I want to do well so I can look after others.”
“Society and my friends life's I guess. And maybe the fear of ending up wasting my uni degree because you might not get hired easily after having been traveling around for years instead of getting some work experience.”
“Hm...academic background of my family, they expect me to do well although they're not super crazy about pushing me or anything like some parents.
But that's mostly uni/school related, after that I have my own plans”
“I don't really want to be anything like my family so I'm trying to branch out and do different things”
“Experience. They've changed as I get older and I think they'll continue to change. You expect different things throughout the years because you have a better grasp of what you can and should expect for yourself and what is just a pipe dream.”
“I don't have that many expectations for my life past university. I only know that I never want to permanently have a 9-5 office job or be doing something that I hate. And I know this because I see people all around me (including my parents) wasting their lives in offices every day.”
“Seeing where my parents are now and what I have been told by career advisers in High school. They say that going to uni is very beneficial”
“Mainly from my parents. I want to make them proud. Other expectations are formed around what my peers are getting and what the media presents”
“Family and other 'real' adults and myself and a bit from friends/ peers”
“Partly my parents with a mix of my brothers also, being the youngest of 3 puts pressure to succeed.
However large life expectations do come from media as well.”
“Mixture of making myself happy, my parents/family happy, and also a responsibility to work towards the betterment of society, humanity, life and existence in general. Once your eyes are opened up to the atrocities of the world, I think my duty towards making the world we live in a better place comes before personal issues.”
“Being the eldest and feeling responsible to be the successful child. Also my parents were married and had a family young, so I've grown up with the idea of having everything sorted before I'm 25.”
“From adults telling me I should amount to something in my life”
“From what people around me say and tell me. Also from what I have observed whether it be in person or through different media. “
“Probably from my mother. Her strong ideas and beliefs have influenced how I see the world and what I want to accomplish.”
“Many of my expectations come from watching my family and friends not reach their expectations. My expectations are not super high or exceptional because of this, but this also means I am fufilling my expectations rather than being let down or feeling pressured to be better.”
“People around me. My parents didn't travel until later in life so travel isn't high on my priorities, I want to but I want to start savings for a house when I finish uni.”
“I think expectations are built in highschool. The highschool curriculum pushes kids to either drop out or go straight to university. I never expected to drop out of uni after first year but the expectation that was set in everyone's minds was that I should have stayed until I finished.”
“My parents are my relationship goals.... my life expectation comes from my dreams I guess (and people in my life telling me I can do anything). I think my expectations for life are pretty high.”
Are your expectations of what you want or what you feel others want you to do?
“My expectations are to succeed in doing what I love and live a good life and make enough to be happy, I feel like that's what I want, and what others want for me really”
“My own. I expect to achieve highly at uni to be able to carry the skills I learn into the future”
“Probably of what the people and society around me want me to do - finish uni, get a good career, travel a bit, find a husband etc. It's only in the last year or so that I've really questioned if I want kids. The expectation of having kids is ingrained in our society and I think most people my age just expect they'll have kids later in life - why?”
“There is still a great expectation for me to settle down with a man and although not get married yet, prepare myslef for that day. But i would rather travel and do the things I want to do without any constraints of other peoples agendas. I am in no rush to settle down and although I am not neccessarily actively staying single I also believe that if I am going to compromise in a time in my life when I am the freest I will ever be that it needs to be truely worth it.”
“Yes my parents have lots of expectations for me to come home over breaks and over summer to come straight home after uni and start working”
“What I want, but i guess i also want to impress people that matter to me”
“A bit of a mix - I want to do well for myself and also to make my family/friends proud”
“I want what a few of my cohorts want from me too but at the same time I'm not sure of my own mold in the first place therefore I don't know what either them or I want.”
“A bit of both but I'm learning to do what I want”
“Both. That's hard.”
“They are what I want to do but are triggered from what others want me to do”
“The way I'm living my life is probably 80/20 in favour of what I believe others expect of me vs what I really want to do. Having that awareness doesn't actually make it any easier to digest unsurprisingly.”
“I believe the only opinions that matter are the ones who genuinely care for you, and if they care for you then they support you no matter what you do. Except if you're doing nothing. But if you're doing nothing, then they should still support you and help you get off your ass.”
“I try not to let what others want or expect from me affect me too much. I try and set myself goals every day to help me break down the big picture of what I want otherwise I get overwhelmed! I want to learn as much as possible, create strong relationships with people who I care about and support me. I want to travel.”
“What i want. Screw the others. But still. I wanna look after my mum. But she doesn't expect expect things from me anyway.”
“Yes. Now that I'm older I believe my parents, friends and family have let go of their expectations of my life and just want me to be happy. And that what makes me happy is not the same thing as makes them happy.”
“50/50, there's a certain responsibility you feel when you're the only one in your family that's gone to university, and the expectations that others have on you to make them proud”
“My family is disappointed I didn't go to Law School. However, they're happy for me. I am the first out of the whole entire family to go to Uni so me graduating is a really big deal.”
“As I've got older it has become more clear to me that what my goals and expectations are, should be a reflection of what I want, not for example what my mother wants. At this stage in my life, I've began to realize that it is okay to say no and do what I think is best.”
“I feel some pressure to make the most of the oportunities i have been given, but it doesnt worry me too much”
“Im really independent and wouldn't let other opinions influence my LIFE.You only get one, and I'm here for a good time not a long time.”
“Bit of both, I guess most people believe that somewhat society plays a roll in life. However I set my end goals and I fight for what I want.”
“I feel like I exceed most things people expect of me, I focus more on what I want.”
“I'm a people pleaser, it's hard ingrained in my nature so definately option two.
I'm working on it being option one though.”
“yes my family are really inconsiderate of what you want to do personally instead of letting u do what u want”
“My expectations are the most important but my parents' and managers' expectations tie in pretty similarly so there aren't any issues.”
“No not at all. They are the expectations I have always had for myself because I knew it wouldn't be handed to me on a platter.”
“what i want! it comes from maturing. I can only disappoint myself and make myself happy.”
“A mixture of both, even being 20 I still look to my mums advice and even though sometimes what she says goes against everything I believe in or want, I still seem to find myself being heavily influenced and effected by what she says.”
“I expect more from myself than I should I think. I am only 20 so I should probably let a few things go instead of worrying about them. And I think people don't expect any more of me than I believe I can achieve”
“What others want me to do mostly. My expectations are similar for myself but I wonder how different my expectations would be if I didn't care about others expectations.”
“My main goal in life is to be happy but my parents don't veiw life like that so I am constantly torn between wanting to not take life to seriously and settling down with a serious job.”
“My expectation of going back to uni - my parents back me up but they are probably nervous I'll drop out again. They just want to best for me and don't want me to waste my money.
Friends- good friends are honest and definitely support me going to uni. Travel, they definitely understand that but have done their hard years without it.”
“About 80% what I want to do, 20% what I am expected to do.”
“To do the risk free sensible thing but I've been brought up to do anything as long as I'm happy with it”
“They're of what I want. Although I'm not too sure what I want yet so I'm just winging it really.”
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